If Christmas is generally a bleak time for you, it can feel harsh to be among brightly coloured lights and smiling families who are looking forward to their seasonal rituals.
I read about a couple who are going to close the curtains, turn off the tv and put on their MP3 headphones until 'all the fuss dies down', as they put it. That kind of opting out may seem like a solution, but I couldn't help wondering if it might heighten the sense of not belonging to their community?
Others who have an equal sense of dread and an urge to escape all the forced jollity are taking a different tack this year.
We've suggested, that in order to avoid painful memories of Christmas past, that our clients can choose to decide that no more of their Christmases will be tainted by their past experiences and to help them start afresh we've suggested that they reinvent Christmas for themselves this year.
It may not be your preference to dress a tree with coloured lights, but what about marking the midwinter week with a new ritual, one that you begin this year, and that can become your new Christmas to fine-tune each year, one that will give you joy?
First, take a little time to imagine some of the better days that you have had in your life. What did you enjoy about them? Did they involve other people, other places or other experiences? Could you replicate any elements of these experiences this Christmas? It might mean that you buy yourself a few items through December, some special tea or coffee, a book, a scent, a textured cushion and a CD, perhaps and save them for Christmas Day. That would be a real treat for your five senses.
By focussing on your preferences and becoming increasingly comfortable with your own way to spend Christmas, there would be less of a sense of not doing it right, or being left out.
However you choose to spend it this year, I hope that you have a good one.
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